New Year's Eve provides the opportunity, or excuse rather, to over imbibe in
champagne, sparkling wines, and random other libations in the heat of the
celebratory mood. Nothing however, agitates me more than seeing revelers shake
up a perfectly good bottle of wine or them holding the bottle up in the air as they
cork it, causing champagne to explode all over the place... wasting half of the
goods and knocking someone in the face with the cork, in the process. It's a waste! by the time the fizz settles there's fuckall in
the bottle and barely enough to go around. That being said... here are a few
tips suggesting how one might want to open a bottle, like a decorous drunk. It
works... I've opened bottles of champagne on flat, level surfaces before without
damn near putting someone's eye out and causing the drink to go all over the floor and walls. Enjoy!
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